Coping with Infertility

When you decide to add a child to your family it becomes an exciting adventure, that is until infertility joins the team.  At that point crisis and shock usually set in, sometimes along with blame and shame.  It is time to take a deep breath, assemble your support staff and make plans.  Breathing can calm us down in some remarkable ways which means yoga, meditation, biofeedback, deep counted breaths and exercise all count.  Deep counted breaths are as follows:  rest for four counts, breathe in for four counts, rest for four counts and breathe out for four counts.  Start again and see how long you can do this, and if you can add counts.  It is easy and can be accomplished anywhere.  Your support staff includes doctors, acupuncturists, therapists, friends, family, coworkers, and anyone else you trust.  The staff can be as small as you and your partner and a doctor or much bigger.  Choosing people that help, distract and ask questions is essential.  Finally you make a plan.  One you can always change, it includes your emotional, physical, spiritual and financial limits.  Trust your plan and stay with it as you go through the myriad of tests that you might need.  Words like IVF, Adoption, Selective Reduction and others begin to feel like second nature.  Expand and breathe with them as you decide on your family size and composition.